5.22.2011

Fight Club Rule #4:


4. Your 3-D special effects will not save your lazy ass crap script. That's a trick you can only pull out of the hat once, and Avatar (2009) ate that rabbit.

8 comments:

  1. I'm so with you on this one. I hate 3-D and refuse to see it ever again. They fucked me over for the last time with Avatar. First, it's extortion. 5 extra dollars for an effing pair of cheap plastic glasses. Un-fucking-believable. Second, the f/x make me ill after a while. I saw Avatar and nearly spewed my Dots all over the guy in front of me after about 30 minutes. It was like an extended acid trip without the fun. Amen on this rule.

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  2. Thank you! I figured I should just make it a rule since I bitch about it so fucking much. Avatar, alright, I get that it was "the first big 3-D movie", so it has that excuse. But now it's like they've got 1000 nerds who suddenly have this exciting new ability to make things pop out at you from the screen, and they're so thrilled to use it they cut out anything of substance from the movies and shove it full of explosions and special effects. I know this was pre-3-D, but it's like the difference between the original Star Wars trilogy and the prequels. They just don't get it.

    And I've got to agree with you there. I'm waiting for them to make Cloverfield in 3-D just to see how many people in one movie theater they can make vomit.

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  3. "They just don't get it." Oh hell to the yeah. If I wanted 3-D, I would go see a play in the real world with living actors and props I could hold in my hand. "...they cut anything of substance...shove it full of explosions and special effects." Hallelujah! I really don't need someone's foot coming at me to know they are kicking the shit out of someone. I'd rather have some story, thank you.

    Cloverfield in 3-D. LMAO! Now that would be a ride in the vomit comet.

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  4. LMAO! Exactly. The way I figure it, if you don't have enough of an imagination to imagine the world that the images reside in is 3-D...then why the hell are you going to the movies? Maybe I'm still just pissed off about Priest. But WHAT THE FUCK, cinema?

    Wouldn't it? That's your amusement park, right there.

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  5. So..do scripts for planned 3D movies have stage directions for the 3D action?

    I mostly avoid them like the plague. Seen no more than 5 in the last two years, among them Avatar and TRON. I rule. Though I did see Drive Angry in 3D, too. I suck.

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  6. "And now...you punch your fist STRAIGHT through the camera!"

    Yeah, I have no idea. But I agree--like the plague, definitely. I would contract the plague just to avoid 3D. Drive Angry was the only movie I would've broken my 3D chastity belt for, but by time I finally got my shit together to see it, it was out of theaters. We don't talk about it. Back to drown my sorrows in Boogie Nights.

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  7. I love the fact that 3D is sort of backfiring on movie studios. They say POTC 4 would have made more money had there been more 2D showings ahah

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  8. HAHA! In your face, 3D! Really, I hope they just drop the 3D crap. Or at least make 2D viewings more available, and keep 3D for those who need that weird rollercoaster thrill.

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