12.25.2010

Ho Ho Ho. Merry Christmas, You Naughty Motherfuckers.

BLACK SANTA'S REVENGE (2007)
Image from http://badazzmofo.com
Christmas came early this year, all thanks to a post made by The Lighting Bug's Lair. Santa with a gun, treacherous elves, slutty hookers who want nothing more than a chance to sit on Ol' Nick's lap? Yes, please. Black Santa's Revenge is a short blaxploitation flick staring Ken Foree, best known for his role in the original Dawn Of The Dead. Black Santa (not kidding, that's what he's listed as on IMDB) dons the costume of Santa and brings joy to the kids of the ghetto, promising them they'll get gifts even though their parents can't afford them. But Santa's got a surprise--a shit ton of toys shoved in the back for the kids this year. Yep. This Santa keeps his promises. Until a gangster who hates Santa AND Christmas comes and steals all the toys. And so it begins, and Black Santa goes on a roaring rampage of revenge to get the toys back and save Christmas.

The thing is, this is just one of those movies that's fun to say you saw it. "Oh, what'd you do for Christmas?" "Yeah, I dropped A Christmas Story this year and went with Black Santa's Revenge instead." It's fun, it's campy, and it's just one of those movies worth watching to get into the holiday spirit. As much as "Fa-ra-ra-ra-ra" will always make me laugh. Plus, it's only 20 minutes long, and it's worth every minute. Sure, it's low budget and it shows, but it you can get passed the "special effects" and artistic design, the plot is fun, the characters are hysterical, and Ken Foree makes one badass Santa.

"Making my list, checking it twice, gonna put all you naughty motherfuckers on ice."
It's basically impossible to get this movie unless you download it from the homepage, where you can get an online copy for only $3.99. Totally worth it. 

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight.

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