I May Be A Bastard, But I'm Not A Fucking Bastard.

QT BLOGATHON: FROM DUSK TILL DAWN

...is a quote that pretty accurate describes my tucked-tail return to the blogosphere. I know what you're thinking: IT'S ALIIIIVE! It turns out as soon as you start making money, the important things in life go down the crapper. Like paying tribute to one of the greatest directors of our time--the one and only, Quentin Tarantino. Thanks to recently leaving the world of unemployment, I've been a terrible lesbian mother to this blog. And, of course, there's the QT Blogathon to think about. This month was dedicated to one of my favorite late-nights-with-lots-of-friends-and-lots-of-popcorn movies, From Dusk Till Dawn (1996). Since I've already written up a review of From Dusk Till Dawn, I was going to tackle Four Rooms (1995) this month instead. I failed. But I still plan on getting on Four Rooms in the future. In the meanwhile, here's some love to From Dusk Till Dawn:

1. Mr. Darko of The Movie Log waxes poetic about the campiness that is From Dusk Till Dawn. And includes a badass poster.

2. The Smoking Pen has an old little Dusk Till Dawn bit wisdom: "fight now, cry later."

Definitely check out my man Mr. Darko. In other news, this month is Jackie Brown (1997). I haven't seen this one in quite a while, so I'm stoked. Especially for Samuel L. Jackson's hair. Shit's about to get REAL. If you have any Jackie Brown posts/videos/luggage bags, send them my way at mhufstader (at) gm.slc.edu (note the email change, I'm finally switching out from earthlink).

A Life In Movies.

A LIFE IN MOVIES

So it came to my attention that there's this awesome little blogathon created by Fandango Groovers going down called "A Life In Movies". We're supposed to post May 8th, but I got too excited (that's what he said). The premise is to start with the year you're born, and list your favorite movie of every year up to the present. It's a good way to find out everyone's age make a list of a handful of your favorite movies, but I kinda already did that. So I don't risk completely repeating myself, like the maverick I am, I decided to switch it up a bit. Instead of listing my all time favorites (i.e., movies I respect and admire for their badassitry and consider great works of art), I'm going to list my all time guilty pleasures (i.e., generally big budget fluff movies that are like crack to me and I couldn't stop watching if I tried). Without further ado...

1989. Weekend At Bernies. My go-to movie whenever I had to stay home from school sick. I couldn't tell you how many times I've seen Larry and Richard drag that corpse around. It may account for my sick sense of humor.

1990. Goodfellas. Just a genius movie, no bones about it.

1991. The Silence Of The Lambs. I want to make sweet, sweet love to Jodie Foster's husky voice. Well, Jodie Foster period, but I'll take her voice, too.

Pierce Brosnan, tool of the year.

1992. The Lawnmower Man. Alright. Disclaimer. I hate this movie. It is ridiculous in ways I can't wrap my head around, and I've seen some fucked up shit. However, it's just way too much fun to watch at 3 AM with a room full of friends and rip into.

1993. Jurassic Park. Never gets old. Ever. Ever. DINOSAURS.

1994. Pulp Fiction. My favorite movie of all time. Though I recently watched it high and got a whole different experience from it. Just goes to show you can always learn something new about those movies you know by heart.

1995. Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls. Another childhood favorite. I basically grew up watching Jim Carrey talk out of his ass.

1996. From Dusk Till Dawn. This one taught me a great life lesson: kill the vampires first, cry over your fallen comrades later.

You will not remember this movie.

1997. Men In Black. This one put Will Smith on the map for me. It's just a classic.

1998. Rush Hour. I know, kill me. But it was my first Jackie Chan, and while it's hardly his best work (if anything, it's probably his worst), it made me fall for him so it has a special place in my heart.

1999. The Mummy. I bet you thought I was going to say The Matrix? Yeah, so did I. But the thing is, as dear as that movie is to me, The Mummy brings up some serious nostalgia I can't deny.

2000. Gladiator. I saw this back when I knew Joaquin Phoenix as "that dude with the weird lip". Still, it's just a solid movie.

2001. The Lord Of The Rings. C'mon. I know you can't listen to the theme song without feeling your heart swell with nerdy joy.

Say "homicide".

2002. Road To Perdition. So you know how I just said Pulp Fiction was my all time favorite? This is a close fucking second. It helped that I saw it during the period of my life when I refused to remember actors names, so I was totally blind to how many serious stars are in this movie and got to simply enjoy the pure cinematic badassness of the story and the characters.

2003. Kill Bill Vol. 1. What can I say? The Bride is the shit.

2004. Dawn Of The Dead. I'll probably get some slack for this one, what with remakes always being crap and all. But if you forget that it's a remake, it's just a fun fucking movie. Mainly thanks to this guy.

Who knew her pretty face could scream so well?

2005. The Skeleton Key. New Orleans, voodoo, Kate Hudson's ass, and old fashioned suspense. Yes, please.

2006. The Departed. Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself.

2007. 300. Because THIS. IS. SPARTA.

2008. Rocknrolla. Gay gangsters, drug wastelands, and everything dirty shoved under the carpet of London. Is there anything better?

Nazi killing BAMF.

2009. Inglorious Basterds. Yeah, I know. Another Tarantino take over.

2010. Inception. Because it's hard to beat the hamster wheel fight.

2011. Hanna. I would list all the ways this movie rocks, but I'm too busy being addicted to The Chemical Brothers.

Fight Now, Cry Later.

FROM DUSK TILL DAWN (1996)

Image snagged from HDWarez

In the spirit of October being Halloween month, I think it's about time I got some motherfucking monster movies under my belt. And so, I begin with one of my favorites: the Robert Rodriguez/Quentin Tarantino mash up From Dusk Till Dawn. As someone who watches movies, well, for the movie, I feel it's my duty to give you a preface for all those who haven't seen this. If you haven't seen From Dusk Till Dawn and have very little idea what it's about, DON'T READ THIS REVIEW. In fact, don't read ANY reviews. Don't read reviews, or descriptions, don't even watch the trailer. My experience with this movie runs like this: I went to the video store (ah, the age of actually physically holding movies in your hand before you take them home), saw Quentin Tarantino's name on the cover, and popped it in my player. I jumped into the movie without any idea with what it was about. And so, as it took off, I invested myself in the criminals-on-the-run aspect. In the hostage situation. In the two sets of characters the story runs with. And then, halfway through, once they're at the Titty Twister and the movie turns into a...well...completely and utterly different genre, I was caught totally off guard. And fucking loved it. So, this is the last time I'll say it, if you're still reading and you haven't seem this movie, what's wrong with you? The time to stop starts here.

Movie poster from impawards.com

Now. All the rest of you ramblers. Let's get rambling. This movie in my mind is a Grindhouse pre-Grindhouse. It's Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino's first real badass baby (not counting Tarantino's segment in Four Rooms, while that was badass in it's own right, wasn't so much a feature film). It's proof that the two really should never stop making movies together. The first half is pure Tarantino. The long stretches of seemingly casual conversation, perfect character studies condensed into a single flowing conversation, layered with a building tension or a sudden dramatic twist. The beginning shot with the Texas Ranger (who cares if Michael Parks is typecasted in every Tarantino movie? He's fucking gold) is a perfect example of what seems to be simple conversation, layered suddenly with the threat of the Gecko Brother's entrance. 

While George Clooney usually makes it impossible NOT to love him, this is hands down my favorite of his roles (yes, even better than Ocean's 13). Seth Gecko is a cool cat; he's intimidating, but trustworthy, and he's got a cool as fuck tattoo. He's the one person you don't want to fuck with, yet at the same time you can't help but want to be his friend. It's no surprise that someone who could pull off that role would land the spot of a retranslated Odysseus in the Coen Brother's O, Brother, Where Art Thou?. His charisma demands the attention of every scene. At the same time, Quentin surprisingly matches Clooney's performance, as Seth's twisted and paranoid brother Richie Gecko. Tarantino seems to have an uncanny knack for playing uncontrollable rapists. I'm not sure whether I should be worried. Nonetheless, the two have an amazing chemistry, especially delivered when Richie takes advantage of the hostage, leaving Seth to rub his nose in it (sidenote: the splicing of the hostage's body with Seth's repulsed expression? Chills. And it's hard to freak me out).

On the flip side, we have the Partridge Family. Harvey Keitel plays Jacob, the "Mean Motherfucking Servant Of God" preacher who's lost his faith after the death of his wife. As usual, Keitel delivers, quiet but calculating, the voice of reason in every situation. After the Wolf, Jacob, and Mr. White, if Keitel told me to jump a bridge, I'd jump it. Jacob is taking care of his two kids, Kate (played by a young Juliette Lewis) and his adopted chinese son Scott (played by Ernest Liu who, unsurprisingly, did not go on to be a star, but to his credit, he gave the role everything it required). This family of three gets turned upside down once they have a run in with the Gecko brothers and are forced to help them down past the border of Mexico. 

This is NOT a psycho.

Lo and behold, halfway through the movie, the trailer tugs on passed the border and the odd group reaches the Titty Twister. And the story's over and everyone lives happily ever after. Right. Right? Wrong. Rodriguez steps in. And suddenly, what was an amazing fucking crime movie about dodging the cops and holding hostages turns into an amazing fucking vampire/creature/whateverthefuckthosethingsare movie. Rodriguez comes in campy, twisted, and bloody as the smoking hot strippers suddenly turn the tables on the wolf-eyed men--prey eats predator. It's, in my mind, the perfect combination: Rodriguez gives us a full strip tease delivered by none other than the beautiful Salma Hayek (with a SNAKE. C'mon, people), and then returns favor to the ladies who rip the power back from the men between their bloody fangs. The vampires are savage, brutal, and disgusting--they won't lift their pinky fingers as they sip blood from crystal glasses or sparkle in the sunlight. These blood thirsty bastards are straight up classic vampire--they burn when sunlight hits them, they're wary of crosses, they turn into bats, and they're straight up Nosferatu ugly. These vampires will not be your friends and they will not be your lovers. In fact, Seth Gecko offers the best advice anyone has ever given in a creature film when he says: "fight now, cry later!"

With great actors, a great script, and to top it all off, a great soundtrack (Tito & Tarantula, the band from the Titty Twister, match the tone of movie beautifully), it's very hard for this movie not to make anyone's favorite's list. Do yourself a favor and rewatch it this Halloween.