Coming To A Theater Near You!

Upcoming Attractions

It's that time again. Time to drag out a bunch of upcoming trailers and see if there's anything worthwhile coming up in the near and/or distant future. It's like fantasy football, except you're almost always bound to be disappointed with the results.

1. I needed this in my life yesterday.

Thank Melissa for this one. I saw the trailer and just about wet myself. The cast is excellent, the premise sticks to one of those if-it-ain't-broke-don't-fix-it formulas, and the main character is a badass fucking chick out for blood. I need say no more.

2. Shut your face--I'M FUCKING PUMPED.

I can't fucking wait. Does it matter that I haven't seen the last Mission Impossible movies in years? No, no it doesn't. Because the action looks killer, the cast is fantastic, and what can I say, I like Tom Cruise when he's being himself--a complete and utter tool. Even if he has the most ridiculous run known to mad kind. I'm there.

Anton Yelchin? David Tennant? Toni Collette? I'll admit--even Colin Farrell, even though he's a completely hit or miss actor (owned his role in In Bruges (2008), then ad-libbed the rest of his career, what gives?). Let's just hope this is a hit. I will add that I've never seen the original Fright Night (1985), so I have zero reason yet to hate this movie on principle.

3. It's a toss up.

Alright. The thing is, I would be so fucking stoked for this movie. If Inception (2010) didn't already exist. I know its a faulty comparison, but. Eh. There's just something that doesn't click. I'll probably end up seeing it anyway.

Like the action, like the actors, like the comedy. Dislike paying $11.00 for it. I'll probably wait for a rental.

I can't wait to get wasted and wake up with this ticket stub, a lemur, and Zach Gallifinakis lying in bed next to me going: "What the hell happened last night?"

4. I was with you until the title.

Self explanatory.

I just started laughing. It was all I could do. It was laugh or cry, really.


  1. Super pumped for Haywire! Also looking forward to seeing 30 Minutes Or Less and Fright Night.

    Battleship looks hilariously bad.

  2. I know!! I saw Haywire and about near died with the badass that is that movie. Here's to hoping it lives up to the trailer!

    Battleship is one of those things that had everyone's attention, but as soon as the name came up, the theater broke up with scoffs and laughter. Transformers was bad enough. Do we REALLY have to suffer another movie based off a game?

  3. Why thank you for the shout my home girl! Check out Colombiana with Zoe Saldana on August 26. Looks pretty cool even if it is Zoe Saldana and not Gina Carano. From the looks, I'd trust her to cover me.

    I was laughing at Battleship too. However, it is my token pretty boy sugar coma. I have a thing for Taylor Kitsch. Don't ask. It's all a superficial thing. I just want to do illegal things to him.

  4. Great list, Im definitely looking forward to MI:4, Haywire and In Time. Keep up the great entries man!


  5. @ Melissaa--You're welcome! And damn, I knew I was missing something! I might have to give Colombiana its own write up. It looks badass, even if it is literally Nikkita pt. 2.

    HAHA! I will so not ask. Illegal things are always good. I would probably see it for Liam Neeson if anything. It has a lot of good actors! Just...the plot...what?

    @ Sam--Thanks, homie! Definitely good movies to put on your list. Here's to hoping we have a good winter for movies!

  6. Oh...not cool to lump ROTPOTA (worst acronym ever!) along with Battleshit. You know it's a bad trailer/movie when folks are openly laughing at the in the theater. Not a good sign.

    LOL at the Tom Cruise running line.

  7. Normally...I'd disagree with you. Except I just saw the unfortunately acronymed ROTPOTA and now I've got to agree, it isn't as bad as I thought it'd be. Battleshit--they might actually sell tickets if they outright called it that!

    Bwahaha, thanks! Homeboy needs to learn how to run without puffing up his chest.

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